annoytheleft

Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

Democrats Unveil New Logo

In Democrat, Humor on September 16, 2010 at 8:28 am

Baldilocks says:

A ‘D’ with an ‘O’ around it? Looks like the Democrats are acknowledging who owns them.  That’s what brands are for, no?

Update:

The Looking Spoon has better ones more of them:

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Castro: Cuban Model Doesn’t Work

In Education, Humor on September 8, 2010 at 3:15 pm

And the rest of the world says: No @#$!, Sherlock!

Jeffrey Goldberg, a national correspondent for The Atlantic magazine, asked if Cuba’s economic system was still worth exporting to other countries, and Castro replied: “The Cuban model doesn’t even work for us anymore” Goldberg wrote Wednesday in a post on his Atlantic blog.

Okay, maybe not the rest of the world but, at the very least, the part that isn’t fantasizing about their own Marxist Utopia. So, that pretty much excludes Hugo Chavez, William Ayers, most of the UN bureaucrats and, to our great misfortune, President Obama. Everyone else thinks Castro might be the slowest learner in human history:

h/t Iowahawk via Twitter

Watson! Get In Here!

In Humor, Republican on September 7, 2010 at 10:42 pm

The only good phone is a dead phone.

I sometimes imagine that it’s 1875 and, for reasons unknown, I’m a trusted acquaintance of Alexander Graham Bell. I imagine that Bell turns to me and says, “I’m considering making a device that will transmit a person’s voice over wire in order to communicate over distance to another person. What say you to that idea?” My answer, of course is absolutely not! I hate talking on the phone.

In spite of my utter loathing of the device, I spent my evening volunteering at my County GOP headquarters’ phone bank. I sort of expected a little more fanfare from the staff but I guess they don’t understand the depth of my reticence.

It’s Not You, It’s Me…

In Humor on September 5, 2010 at 6:08 pm

There are a few conservative bloggers out there whose humor I can always count on. King Shamus and Iowahawk are the kind of personalities that I’d like to see in a buddy road-trip movie. I imagine them rolling along in their convertible a la Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas and perhaps receiving timely advice at a roadside diner from a mysterious, fedora-wearing stranger.

Iowahawk has already written the break-up scene that inspires our protagonists to hit the open road:

Barack, can we, uh, talk for a few minutes?

Oh, nothing. It’s just that it just seems we haven’t had a chance to talk for a while. I mean, I know we’ve both been busy for the past year or so. You with your fundraisers and golfing and stuff, and me with all those appointments at the unemployment office…

…Where was I? Oh yeah. I guess what I was trying to say is that those early days were magical. But, well, maybe magic isn’t the best basis for a… Shit. Look, maybe the best way to do this is just come out and say it. I think it’s best if we take a break.

[Cue Born to be Wild]

Seriously, it’s worth reading the whole thing, especially when the conversation turns to Fredericks of Stockholm.

Can Khalid Sheikh Mohammed’s Beard Talk?

In Humor, Terrorist on September 4, 2010 at 8:43 pm

FIREDOGLAKE wonders if Khalid Sheikh Mohammed’s beard can tell the story of his treatment at Guantanamo through the stress hormone Cortisol stored in his hair.

Frankly, it doesn’t matter if KSM’s beard can talk, all I’d hear is “blah, blah, blah… I’m a dirty tramp terrorist.”

Dear Tripp…

In Culture, Humor on August 29, 2010 at 1:52 pm

Perhaps time will bring maturity.

As long as I’m writing letters to Alaskans, I might as well add this one:

Dear Tripp, I’m so sorry.

Sincerely,

Annoy the Left.

Rasmussen: 29% Say U.S. Heading in Right Direction

In Humor on August 25, 2010 at 2:26 pm

According to a Rasmussen survey released today:

Twenty-nine percent (29%) of Likely Voters say the country is heading in the right direction, according to a new Rasmussen Reports national telephone survey taken the week ending Sunday, August 22.

While up a point from last week, confidence in the nation’s current course has ranged from 27% to 35% since last July.

This is roughly the same percentage of Americans who believe in UFO’s. Coincidence? I think not…

From the “Unbelievable But True” File:

In Humor on March 29, 2010 at 8:31 pm

Newsmax:

Ricky Martin is no longer denying the rumors: He’s gay.

In a statement posted via Twitter in both Spanish and English, Martin said: “I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man. I am very blessed to be who I am.”

For many, Monday’s announcement will come as no surprise; the “Livin’ La Vida Loca” singer’s sexuality has been speculated about for years. But the Puerto Rican star, who got his start as a child in the teen group Menudo, never directly addressed it and was usually seen at events with beautiful women on his arm.

Confirmation of Ricky Martin’s sexual orientation was the last barrier to lasting world peace. Now the world can move on.

Does Nancy Pelosi Weigh More Than a Duck?

In Humor on March 26, 2010 at 12:07 pm

From NONSENSIBLE SHOES:

Pelosi witchcraft. It’s frightening.  Seriously, how do you think she managed to get health care through that chamber not once, but twice? She has supernatural powers to compensate for her, uh, beauty.

I don’t know whether or not Nancy Pelosi is a witch or whether it was witchcraft that she used to ram health care through the House. Apparently there’s a surefire way to tell. Scientific analysis and detailed instructions in the video: